News so far

Well I'm still working on "strings" and it's going pretty well, on the whole. Most of the issues I had before seem to have been resolved, and I realise some of it has been my need to protect myself from attacks to my own self esteem. The lack of communication was probably the biggest issue, compounded by the fact that all involved aren't entirely adult, and so there's some degree of loss of energy and focus as egos clash and the learning curve is established.

This has certainly been a huge lesson for me in the making of a film, even though I haven't been playing a direct part in the production of it, other than playing a role in it. But I have certainly been picking up things about direction, lighting, composition, writing, camerawork, and a variety of things I'm going to need to know when it comes time to actually make my own masterpiece. There's something to be said, for sure, about making films in the low budget, "guerrilla" way. There's a real sense of being alive. It's exciting, for sure.

I just want to write something that's closer to my own values; that's more real, more gritty, and has more depth to character, plot, and such. I'm much more interested in really looking at what makes the characters tick, and what lends them to motivation to do things than's been explored in this film. Having said that, kudos to Ben and Mark for making this film, especially at their age.

And age, for me, is another concern. I know that the esteem issues I've dragged around with me my entire life can work for me or against me in the making of my own project. They can work for me if I use them in the script. They can work against me if I don't maintain a sense of "can do" and keep up the positive self talk.

I do need to keep reminding myself, for example, that the making of this film is all adding to the making of my own. The experience is invaluable: I'm doing something NOW towards the production of my own thing.

And, of course, I have my own projects that I'm continuing with: a video for someone next week, a likely July 4th thing, a documentary about a brilliant sculptor here in Austin, as well as my wedding projects.

Then there are the other projects I've worked on for others that are still being edited, as well as the wonderful work which I know is coming to me from other sources over the coming months: the films, commercials, videos, corporate shoots, shorts and so forth that will come through my agents and others.

So many good things are happening!